(Goizueta, Navarre | © Google Maps)
Adalberto neither knew the machinations of politics nor the motivations of politicians. Ensconced in an uncontroversial world that comprised of a plot of land inherited from his devout and hardworking peasant father, an uncomplaining wife and a flock of sheep, Adalberto lead an existence that was prosaic. Rising along with the sun and also retiring with it, his was a life that provided beautiful testimony to the fact that the earth was serenely spinning along its axis.
Until he was influenced by Yaguati and his talks of separatism, Basque pride etc. “Just come for one demonstration”, he implored.
When the first rock whizzed through the air and cracked the policeman’s jaw, all hell broke loose. Adalberto didn’t even realise a dagger was in his bloodied hands.
Now they were coming for him. His poor refuge of a cabin couldn’t last long. Every shadow was fate closing in on him.
(Word Count: 149)
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12 comments
Your opening description evokes a peaceful, pastoral existence. You then pick up the pace to very good effect and tumble us through politics, a bloody murder and onrushing justice. Good story!
Thank you so much! It was a challenge to fit the entire story from a prosaic commencement to a crescendo of a climax. Glad that you liked it.
Lots going on here for sure.
Very exciting, which is suprising, because you clearly demonstrated Adalberto’s peaceful nature. The pastoral quickly turns political, and will soon, I fear, turn penal. Tumbling action, coiled tight with emotion.
Thank you so much! The cabin in the picture gave me the idea for the notorious twist. Else would have continued and concluded in a pastoral vein!
I agree with everyone above. From serenity to panic in so few words. I wish him well.
Thank you so much!
Poor Adalberto is now part and parcel of separatist movement. Police will hunt him down, if he ratted separatists will. Innocence lost for ever.
Very well done. You controlled your pace well. Damn politics…
Thank you so much for the encouraging words! Detestable politics indeed!
Excellent storytelling. Emotion, tension, politics, and a sympathetic character all packet in one taut tale!
Thanks Much!